Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “How long does getting a divorce take?”
This blog continues our series of posts discussing a recent Yahoo article about reasons to get out of bad marriage.
In the first article, we mentioned the first reason given by Ronnie Tyler, the author of the piece. We discussed how a desire for happiness and a recognition that you deserve better might be a reason to either divorce or make serious changes to a relationship.
This week, the second reason given by Tyler to get out of a bad relationship is because your children deserve better. Though you deserving a happy and fulfilled marriage should be enough of a reason to make a change, many people find it easy to put their own needs last. However, those with children understand how important the parental desire to protect your offspring truly is.
Tyler says that though some people may not have the strength to get out of a bad relationship for themselves, the hope is that they would be able to make the change for their children. Tyler says that parents should consider how the bad relationship might negatively affect the kids. For instance, the fighting and name-calling can send bad messages to impressionable children about what qualifies as a “healthy” relationship. In cases where more serious problems exist, such as infidelity or abuse, getting out becomes essential to shielding your children from a potentially destructive parent.
Many people claim that though there are problems in their relationship they work hard to ensure the kids are shielded from the trouble. While you and your spouse might take pains to close the bedroom door before fighting, that does not mean your children don’t know what’s happening. After all, children are incredibly perceptive, even young ones, and have a finely tuned ability to detect unhappiness in their parents. Children not only see these problems, but they frequently internalize them. Listening to parents fight can add a lot of unnecessary stress and anxiety to your children’s lives.
Though you might think you’re protecting them from the problems in your marriage, you may in fact be sending them dangerous messages about how they should tolerate poor treatment or unhappiness. To guarantee that you’re sending your children the best message, you have to lead by example. If you want them to believe that happiness matters and that they should not settle for poor treatment, then you have to walk the walk and demand the same out of your relationship.
If you find yourself facing a complicated family matter then you need the help of experienced child custody lawyers in Charlotte, North Carolina who can help guide you through the often confusing process.
“Relationship Wreck: 7 Reasons to Get Out of a Bad Marriage NOW,” by Ronnie Tyler, published at Yahoo.com.
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