Charlotte Divorce Lawyer Blog
Navigating Parenting Styles in Divorce
If you are in the midst of a separation or divorce, you are likely no stranger to conflict. Disagreements have probably brought you to this point, and you may continue to disagree in the future. Clashes in parenting styles may result in arguments that could go unresolved after the marriage is over. Conflicting parenting methods can make co-parenting more challenging after a divorce is final. Some parenting styles work better together than others.
Common Parenting Styles
There are four main parenting styles. Some of the parenting style categories have some sub-categories. Parenting styles have a huge impact on the upbringing of a child and influence their personalities and how they handle issues in their lives.
- Authoritarian – Authoritarian parenting is a strict way to parent. There may be negative consequences for kids who disobey. Children are expected to follow the rules and are not allowed to negotiate or talk back. As a result, children raised with authoritarian parents are often well-behaved and follow rules.
- Authoritative – Authoritative parents are firm but fair. Unlike authoritarians, they are more apt to listen to their children and allow them a voice. Parents set rules and expect children to obey them. This type of parenting style gives children age-appropriate responsibilities. Parents foster independence and provide love and support.
- Permissive – Permissive parents impose few rules and are often very nurturing. They may allow their children to make decisions on their own, yet provide support. These children may become more self-sufficient because they have learned this from a young age.
- Uninvolved – Uninvolved parents take a hands-off approach to their children. They often allow their children quite a lot of freedom and expect them to learn from their own mistakes in some cases. Uninvolved parents may also show less warmth or nurturing than other styles.
Combining Parenting Styles
Parents often have differing parenting styles. This can make co-parenting challenging. Differing parenting styles may have a negative impact on children of divorce, especially when the styles clash. As children get older, they may learn to play one parent against the other, which makes it even more difficult to co-parent. Communication is one of the keys to successful co-parenting. Both parents may need to re-evaluate their parenting style and make adjustments or compromises. Parents may adopt some ways of parenting from other styles to create a unique way of parenting their children.
Take Steps to Resolve Conflict
If you and your former spouse take different approaches to parenting, you will want to take steps to prevent or resolve conflict. Make a rule not to argue in front of the children. If you disagree, talk to each other to try to come to a compromise. Learn to communicate with the other parent, and do not communicate through the children. Keep an open mind and remember that one parenting style may not necessarily be better than another. Remember that you may need to compromise. The end goal is to ensure that you raise your children well, as they are your number one priority. If you are unable to agree, it may be necessary to seek professional help through a family counselor or therapist.
Raising children following divorce is not always easy. One of the first steps to take is to discuss major issues and make decisions prior to your divorce with the help of a parenting plan. Contact our legal team at Arnold & Smith, PLLC, at (704) 370-2828 to request a consultation.
The family law practice group at Arnold & Smith, PLLC includes four Board-Certified Family Law specialists and one Child Welfare Law specialist, as well as several attorneys with many years of family law experience that are committed to providing a powerful voice to individuals facing the often-tumultuous issues in this area of law. The range of issues our family law clients may be facing include pre- and post-nuptial agreements; separation agreements; post-separation support; child support (both temporary and permanent); absolute divorce; divorce from bed and board; military divorce; equitable distribution of assets; child custody (both temporary and permanent); retirement benefits and divorce; alimony and spousal support; adoption; and emancipation. Because this area of the law is usually emotionally charged and complicated, the family law attorneys at Arnold & Smith, PLLC act with the utmost dedication to ensure that each client understands his or her options, and then act to achieve the best result possible for that client’s particular situation.
Source:
https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/parenting_plan
Image Credit:
https://www.freeimages.com/photo/nexus-1315248
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