Divorce

Divorce Can Kill

Published on: January 3, 2012 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

According to a recent report on HuffingtonPost.com, a new study entitled “Divorce and Death” appearing in “Psychological Science” shows that failed marriages can actually kill at the same rate as cigarette smoking or obesity.

The results of the study were shocking as the stark numbers showed that the risk of dying is a full 23% higher among those that have gone through a divorce than married people. Researchers were surprised as they did not believe life expectancy would be slashed to ages comparable with smokers, heavy drinkers, and the obese.

Study authors David Sbarra and Paul Nietert make sure to point out that the association between divorce and death “cannot be deemed causal.” They never intended to imply that the moment you sign divorce papers your life expectancy is slashed. Instead, the research indicates, “there is something uniquely difficult about remaining separated or divorced that accelerates time of death.”

It’s the cumulative strain of being a long-term single parent or the burden of a persistent conflict with an ex that causes the stress that can be a killer. Experts have long believed that interpersonal relationships and health are entangled in a complicated and confusing way. In a sad way, one spouse’s damaging personality trait – whether hostility or negativity – can be responsible both for killing the marriage and, in the long run, for killing the ex.

Ex-husbands are at significantly higher risk of a premature death than their ex-wives. The reason is that it appears wives help keep their husbands alive. Men generally die younger than women, but wives are de facto caregivers. Studies dating back as far as the 1970s have shown that without a woman around, a man’s health fails and he typically refuses to do much about it. Though technology and the ease of self-diagnosis have improved the situation, these are usually afterthoughts. Companionship with a nurturing woman is a built in prevention for sickness in old age.

More North Carolina Couples Divorce in January

Published on: December 29, 2011 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

Is there any truth to the belief that a new year brings new relationships? January is often referred to in family law circles as the “Divorce Month.” The Huffington Post reports that the combination of frantic holidays, family issues and financial stress can bring to light cracks in already strained marriages.

The January divorce label has been applied for a reason; according to statistics published by eDivorcePapers.com, January did indeed have the most legal breakups. One Maryland divorce lawyer confirms that “Divorce Month” really does exist, saying that “Some attorneys take the last two weeks of the year off to get ready for the rush. January really does see a lot of divorces.”

The single biggest day for filing a divorce remains in doubt, though some groups have attempted to identify a single “D-Day.” The Legal Services Commission claims that “the first Monday after the kids return to school” sees the most filings.

A founder of DivorcedWomenOnline.com, says that though filings are most popular in January, the search begins in December. Angry husbands and wives begin searching for information on divorce in the days immediately following the holidays. “I see a huge increase in pageviews and searches the day after Christmas. People start looking for information before the New Year starts, but they can’t do much until the attorneys are back in the office. January 12-16 seems to be the magic week for filings.”

There are many reasons for the New Year’s push, but one big reason is the kids. Often time couples have been struggling for months before the holidays. However, they attempt to put aside their issues to give their children a happy holiday season with an intact family. When January rolls around the magic is gone and often, so is the marriage.

Another big reason is year-end reflection. Unhappy spouses look at their lives and decide they need to make a change. Unhappy spouses take a look at their life more carefully following the rush of the holidays and decide they just cannot endure another year like that.

Taxes also impact a person’s decisions of when to file. Marital status is determined as of December 31 according to the IRS and if a couple wants to file returns jointly they must be married as of that day. Unhappy people facing financial stress may put off divorce until the New Year because they can’t afford to take the financial hit of filing separately.

Another spike occurs in July and August. The reason is that some parents file before the school year starts if they are thinking of relocating and enrolling the kids in a different school district. Summer routines are also important as most parents don’t want to put the children through a painful divorce while they’re at home with nothing to do. Once the school year starts parents are more apt to move forward with filing.

Baby Boomers in North Carolina Increasingly Decide to Call It Quits

Published on: December 20, 2011 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

According to a recent report by the AARP, while the overall divorce rate in the U.S. has declined, divorce among those between the ages of 50 and 64 has spiked. What was once an oddity has now become commonplace.

“Historically we thought, ‘Older people, they don’t get divorced,'” said Susan L. Brown, co-director of the National Center for Family & Marriage Research at Bowling Green University in Ohio. “Now one in four people getting divorced is over the age of 50. In 1990, it was less than one in 10.” Such a huge change has intrigued researchers who are seeking to find out what led to the shift.

The divorce rate for those 50 to 64 increased from 6.9 divorces per 1,000 marriages in 1990 to 12.6 in 2009. At the same time, the overall divorce rate dropped from 18.95 to 17.92.

Researchers have said that the increase in divorce rates among older couples is because of the life transition that takes place upon retirement. Retired couples often face difficulties adjusting to life without children in the house and a busy career to keep them occupied. Retirement especially hits marriages hard as spouses who once defined themselves by what they did now are forced to find new meaning in their lives. Meanwhile, spouses used to being alone most of the day must adjust to having somebody else around.

If one or both of the spouses experienced divorce in the past, they are more at risk for a future divorce later in life, Brown said. The numbers speak for themselves; the divorce rate for aging baby boomers is twice as high for those who were previously divorced than those who were on their first marriage.

Unique issues arise for late in life divorcees. For those looking to remarry in their golden years, the pool of potential mates increases for men because the ratio of women to men increases with age. For women, however, it becomes harder to find a husband. Divorces late in life can also be financially devastating, with the woman typically qualifying for half the man’s retirement savings. Remarriage also raises concerns over estates and inheritances among the couple’s children from previous marriages.

Debt and Divorce in Charlotte, North Carolina

Published on: December 15, 2011 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

According to a recent advice column on FoxBusiness.com, post-divorce debt is one crucial issue often ignored by parties in the aftermath of a divorce. Many mistakenly believe that everything has been resolved by the divorce decree. However, some unfortunate divorcees have discovered that things are not always so simple.

According to former bankruptcy judge and current attorney R. Glen Ayers, “Most divorce decrees allocate liabilities for pre-divorce obligations between the former spouses. So, the husband agrees or is ordered to pay certain credit card obligations and similar debts. The wife may agree or be ordered to pay a car note or some other debts. While the divorce decree may allocate responsibility between the spouses, that decree does not release either spouse from the obligation to the creditor.”

The fact is that even if a settlement agreement lays out who is to pay what debt, it does not mean that the other party is legally released from the formerly joint obligation. If the spouse responsible for making the payments falls behind, then the other spouse remains liable to the creditors, regardless of what the divorce decree says.

The Federal Trade Commission’s website contains advice for anyone considering divorce, saying to pay special attention to the status of your credit accounts. If you maintain any joint accounts with your ex-spouse, it’s critical that you continue making regular payments so that your credit score won’t suffer. As long as there’s a balance on a joint account, you both remain legally responsible for it.

If you do decide to divorce, a skilled North Carolina family law attorney would suggest that you close joint accounts or accounts where your former spouse is listed as an authorized user. You might also consider approaching the creditor directly and ask that they convert the account to an individual account.

Divorce and Sharia Law in North Carolina

Published on: December 13, 2011 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

According to a recent article in the Beaufort Observer, the North Carolina Court of Appeals this week handed down a somewhat surprising decision concerning Islamic Sharia Law. The Court of Appeals decided to grant an annulment to a man on the grounds of bigamy. The husband argued that his marriage of 12 years (and resulting in three children) was null and void because the wife was previously been married according to Sharia Law and that earlier marriage was never properly dissolved.

The North Carolina Court held that the wife’s first marriage was legal despite there being no marriage certificate and it not being performed by an imam or other licensed minister. Because no legal process to void the first marriage was ever undertaken, the Islamic wedding ceremony was upheld as an official legal marriage. Because the first marriage was deemed legal, the wife was already married when she met her second husband and that second marriage thus became null and void.

The decision was a split 2-1 decision which means it is appealable to the North Carolina Supreme Court. The woman in question is looking for assistance finding an attorney because she cannot afford to appeal at the moment.

The recent decision is both interesting and important. The decision upheld Sharia Law by legitimizing an Islamic marriage ceremony that was nothing more than one man pronouncing two individuals husband and wife. No marriage license was involved, no official minister. Yet the actions were condoned by the North Carolina Court of Appeals when they upheld the validity of the first marriage by granting an annulment for the second.

The wife in the case argued that she was divorced when she entered into her second marriage because she had complied with Islamic law for dissolving a marriage. Bizarrely, the Court of Appeals rejected this argument (the exact one they accepted from the husband). On one hand, the Court decided to enforce a religiously-based marriage that did not meet the legal requirements of marriage, while on the other hand the Court refused to accept the religiously-based divorce, instead requiring a civil termination.

Divorce Lawyers for Dads – Worthwhile or a Slick Marketing Campaign?

Published on: November 22, 2011 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

You have probably seen the “BIG D” divorce lawyer commercials on The Golf Channel or maybe on ESPN. They seem to run on channels that men would generally watch and they tug at the heartstrings of men going through, or potentially going through, a legal separation or divorce. The “BIG D” is omnipresent in the lives of the men portrayed in the commercial while a gentleman with a soft southern accent does a moving voiceover. The commercial makes reference to a dad’s perspective in child custody matters as well as illustrating how divorce can affect his financial position (apparently alluding to post separation support, alimony, child support or equitable distribution matters).

Alas, a “nationwide domestic law firm” from St. Louis, Missouri has set up shop in North Carolina. This law firm markets itself as a divorce law firm for men.

One question, obviously, is whether the “Divorce Lawyers for Dads” focus is an advantage or whether it is just a slick marketing campaign. One may also wonder if it is a good thing to hire a “nationwide domestic law firm” or whether it is better to have a lawyer who is local, with deep roots in the community. Obviously, you need to make these determinations for yourself. But, Fox News Charlotte has done this report:

Prenuptial Agreements – Divorce Lawyer Fees Just the Beginning (Costly Sports Divorces)

Published on: November 3, 2011 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

An article recently on Yahoo.com entitled “Ten Costly Sports Divorces” seems to have been spurred by the recent announcement that NBA basketball player Kris Humphries and Kim Kardashian were divorcing after only 72 days of marriage. According to this article, the Humpries-Kardashian wedding cost $10 million. Kardashian filed for divorce citing irreconcilable differences. The couple had a prenuptial agreement in place, so the marriage and quick divorce should not create any complicated financial issues to resolve.

The point of the article is to illustrate how much these various sports figures would have benefited from a prenuptial agreement. Here are the examples that are cited:

Jeff Gordon and Brooke Sealey: The full details of the deal were not disclosed publicly , but according to a report by the Associated Press, Sealey was guaranteed $15.3 million from the sale of two homes. One might guess that she received significantly more than this in alimony and other property distribution.

Michael Jordan and Juanita Vanoy: Juanita Vanoy was awarded $168 million in the divorce settlement.

Greg Norman and Laura Andrassy: This settlement was for $105 million to Mrs. Andrassy.

Lance Armstrong and Kristin Richard: According to a book about Lance Armstrong entitled “Lance Armstrong’s War,” the settlement was for $14 million to Ms. Richard.

Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren: After the highly publicized car accident and allegations of Woods being unfaithful, Nordegren filed for divorce. The full details of the deal were not disclosed but according to “a source close to Nordegren,” she received $100 million.

More Divorce After 7 Years? Or 3?

Published on: October 20, 2011 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

The common saying is “the seven year itch.” The theory being that around the seven year mark in a marriage, the couple is likely to become too comfortable and maybe even disenchanted with the relationship. Similarly, it may be that the rush of first being married has worn off. Or, maybe the couple has finished having babies so that thrill is gone too. Obviously, there is no formula which can predict with any certainty how long a marriage will last. Some end in divorce sooner, some end in divorce later, some marriages do not end in divorce. Perhaps the marriage ends when one of the spouses passes away.

But, according to a study in the UK involving 2,000 respondents, more couples run into trouble after the first three years of the marriage. The data seems to show that this is the point where the honeymoon phase really wears off. Similarly, this is also the point when the couple is likely to be making more significant financial investments together. Maybe the married couple signs an apartment least together, gets a joint bank account, joint cell phone contract, buy a house or maybe start having children (though it seems like couples are waiting longer and longer these days).

Common Law Marriage Appeal Dismissed as Interlocutory

Published on: October 6, 2011 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

The North Carolina Court of Appeals dismissed an appeal as interlocutory. The case involved a man and a woman who had lived together in Texas before moving to North Carolina. The parties moved to North Carolina, separated and the woman filed against the man for absolute divorce, post separation support, alimony and equitable distribution. She alleged that, under Texas law, the parties were common law man and wife. Of course, North Carolina does not recognize common law marriage.
The man answered and denied that the parties were married. He also raised counter claims based upon property rights, but did not raise any Chapter 50 counterclaims. The trial court determined that the parties were not married because, under Texas law, the parties were required to have a present intention to be man and wife. Apparently, the fact that they were separated and suing one another was convincing to the trial court.

Divorce No More?

Published on: September 29, 2011 | On behalf of Arnold & Smith, PLLC

According to a report by Reuters (‘Til 2013 do us part? Mexico mulls 2-year marriage), legislators in Mexico City are considering the concept of temporary marriage licenses. The new law would allow the couple to, on the front end, decide on how long their marriage would be. The minimum duration of of a marriage contract would be for two years – renewable upon the election of the couple. The couple would also decide, on the front end, how children and property would be handled if the contract is not renewed.

Divorce rates in Mexico City are much higher than in other parts of the country. In Mexico City, approximately half of the marriages end in divorce – often within the first two years.