Attorney Matthew R. Arnold answering the question: “How is the amount of child support decided in North Carolina?”
A recent article on CaféMom.com focused on several examples of bad advice that women going through a divorce often hear. The author of the piece says that after she separated from her husband she found herself inundated with unsolicited advice about how to save her marriage.
Though the advice may have been well intentioned, it was usually misguided. Too many people fail to recognize that they will never understand the complicated emotions and actions that go into a marriage and their advice can inadvertently make an already difficult situation even worse.
One example of bad advice for someone facing a divorce is that the couple should simply stay married, that things will get better. This kind of advice is not only wrong, it can be offensive to those facing the end of their marriage, implying that had they simply stuck things out that a divorce would not have been necessary. The fact is that doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result is the definition of insanity and continuing to stay in a broken marriage will not work to anyone’s benefit.
Another bit of bad advice is when friends of family members suggest staying together for the sake of the kids. The fact is children are remarkably able to adapt to changed circumstances and can easily thrive despite the demise of their parents’ marriage. Children are also not stupid and can tell if their parents are unhappy, merely keeping quiet about your displeasure for their sake will only make everyone miserable.